sins of sanity

As the universe questions my sanity, 

I see shadows of evils vanity,

As the devil surrenders to tomorrow, 

I see hopes and ashes of sorrow,

As the greedy hoard their treasures, 

I see lucifers cage and it's pleasures,

As the nymphs prepare for their dances, 

I see hungry eyes prancing, 

As pride spreads it's wings, 

I see blood hounds unleash their wrathful swings,

As I sign away my sanity, 

I see victory in my nemesis insanity ....

binding chains of life....

as i look around my life, 

i see cages incarnate, 

obligations and trust wrapped around,

my hopes and dreams, making them rust,

chains of responsibility, 

suffocate my sensibilities, 

fantasies of what could be, 

shattered by what must be,

i look around and see people,

people, with bigger chains, harsher pains,

i pick up the pieces of my dreams, 

hoping to stitch them with new seams, 

i thread back my hopes, 

dreaming for freedom anew,  

silent tears fall for my fate, 

silent pain throbs for my cages gate, 

i must be, what i must be, 

maybe someday, I will be, what i wish to be......

if someday we meet.....

someday when i will meet you i will tell you my story 

i will tell you about the time i got wings and flew towards the clouds 
i will tell you about the time i went mad and broke everything made of fire
i will tell you about the time i was happy and painted everything black
i will tell you about the time i realized im amazing and cried the whole night
i will tell you about the time i found you , and didnt know a thing about u 
i will telll you about the time i was sad and went crazy laughing
i will tell you about the time i was so heart broken , i couldnt breath 
i will tell you about the time i saw the most beautiful sunset and felt so alone
i will tell you about the time i realized there is magic all around me and i just have to move closer and see it 

but then again ... maybe someday , when i'll fall in love with you 

i will show you the magic in a simple drop of rain 
i will show you the magic in a simple snow flake
i will show you the magic in that simple smlie
i will show you the magic in a single petal of rose
i will show you the magic in that single moment in the night
i will show you the magic in sitting alone and listening to just mere silence

but maybe someday ....if we meet .... i'll show you what life is all about .... 

The devil within .....

As I look out the window of my broken dreams 

I see dark shadows and ripped seams

As I sit on my chair and look into my soul 

I see darkness and demons that are born

As i contemplate the ruthlessness of my destiny

I am burdened by the malevolence of my testimony 

As I hold my pen to fill my journal 

I am struck by the intensity of my evil 

As the curtain of my fate falls

I realize the cruelty of my intentions 

As I look back and wonder where my innocence has gone

I realize the fire of my sins dissolved it all ....

broken memories.....

as i look at the ashes of my memories,

i stand and see a raging fire,

the broken promises, the lost dreams,

the embers of hope,

and my bellowing screams,

what i had envisioned, 

and what manifested,

the crumbled , shattered illusions, 

the tall towering scraps of delusions, 

what once was a promising journey,

was now a cage of despondence, 

what once was filled with miracles,

was now but a pit of despair, 

my purgatory, my fate...

as i dream of her beauty,

my heart breaks,

as i look back at my life,

my senses evade,

as i dream of what could be,

my heart breaks,

as i wake up to reality,

my soul evades,

as i see my empty hands,

my heart breaks,

as i envision those beautiful eyes,

my reality deteriorates,

i am the man i am, 

she made me who i am,

i was a dried up quill,

she filled my heart with her loves ink,

i was a lost soul,

she found me and held me close,

i was a ruthless assasin,

she forgave me and cleansed my sins,

i was forever condemned,

she was my redemption,

i pray to God,

to give her back,

he laughs at me,

and my worlds crack,

i was lost in my purgatory,

and now it welcomes me back.....

as the darkness fell ... the silence screamed

as she walked through the maze of her memories , 

she realized what she had lost .....

                       she realized what she could not find , 

she searched in vain for that one piece in the puzzle, 

the puzzle that was her mind ..... 

                      the journey that was her life , 

she realized the truth behind the silence , 

behind the pain.... 

as she moved further on .... 

she saw life's pitiful gaze .....

the depth of the mountains and the shallowness of the seas , 

the ever blinding madness in her pleas ... 

what could be and what was not , 

the crimson wave that was her soul ...

the crashing waves of her madness , 

the dancing gaze of her lover ...

the consummate lies of the saint , 

the beautiful truths of the sinner....

the shackles of her life, 

the freedom in her desires.... 

the paradoxes in her existence ,

and the never ending persistence....

the betrayed Phoenix

as she saw their betrayal, 

she saw the salacious truth , 

she saw the vindictive stories , 

her feathers scorched with the fire of love ,

her claws bleeding from the scratches of her friends ,

she  looked into her heart , 
and saw gashes of iron .... 

her wings clipped with trust, 

her feet bound with brass 

her colors stolen by love, 

her spirit ripped with a platinum glove

what once was home,

was now a glorified tomb,

what once was created with hope,

was now but only a crippled ghost,

what once was given with trust , 

was now on the pedestal of despair,

she looked around and saw the shadow of her life , 

shadow of the promises , 

shadow of the future .... 

what could be was but a lie , 

what was a promise was now only but a cage ... 

night , the mystical witch

did you ever wonder why the poet loves the night ?​ 

did you ever ask the writer why he craves the night?​ 

have you ever noticed the beauty of that one shiny star?​ 

have you ever knocked on nights dark door?​ 

have you looked for secrets in nights soul?​

did you ever notice the depth, that night has in store?​

​

i guess you haven't .......​

​

but if you ever look close you'll see that night is a lovers chaperone  ...​

it is a child's beautiful dream....​

it is the beginning of a quest and the end of a dream ...​ 

it is a never ending maze that doesn't begin and has no end ...​ 

it can turn tears to gold ...​

it holds all secrets and never bolts a door ....​ 

it is deeper than the oceans and darker than the seas ...​ 

it is the passion of the sinners and the desire of the saints ....​ 

it is the greatest of the mysteries yet simpler than any maze ....​

​

if you look hard enough , you'll find the key , it will unlock nights door .... ​

yet when you try , it will not open nights soul .......​

​

what did you do ? 

what did you do ?​

            night laughs at you ....​ told you it makes no sense .....​

night is like a witch ,

friend to some , 

foe to some ....​ 

if you be wary , it will show you some of its treasures ...​

​

if you look close , you will see beyond your dreams , beyond your realm .......  ​

-hani nusrat

it was just a silent dream .....

it started with a tear

it ended with a smile

it was deep like the mighty ocean​

it was shallow like the little pond​

​

it was based on lies​

it stood due to blind trust​

​

it had so much pain​ 

it had so much love​

​
it was strong like the air​

it was weak like a rock​

​

it was as beautiful as darkness​

it was as ugly as daylight​

​

it was as enchanting as a witches spell​

it was as lethal as a warriors sword​

​

it was as passionate as a lovers tryst​

it was as pure as a saints prayer​

​

it had so much music​ 

it had so many words​

it saw many mornings​

it witnessed many nights​ ​

​

it was like a perfect nightmare  ​

it was like a horrible dream​

​

it started with fear​

it ended with laughter​

​

it was a dream ... just a simple beautiful dream .... no more , no less .... just a forbidden dream , one forbidden night ....

-hani nusrat